Monday 6 August 2012

Bali Day 4

With my stomach almost back in control I decided on a long walk. Turning left out of the hotel I headed towards what I believed to be the beach. Just for the hell of it I had a massage along the way. A very good one. I eventually came to the end of the road and what turned out to be the ocean. The waves were large and signs indicated that the beaches were closed for swimming.
I turned left in the direction of Legion. A long walk, but a nice walk. I would have liked to have a dip in the ocean as by now the day was hot, but common sense prevailed, the surf and undertow could be dangerous. I walked on and eventually came to the Seminyak club. A nice looking spot by all accounts.

Continuing on I came to Potato Head. Potato Head is the current trendy place to be. It has taken over from Ku De Ta as the hip and happening place. Being a westerner and being well dressed I was able to walk in without being stopped by the security guards. I saw others being asked for identity, or maybe the bouncers were just checking that they had enough money to be there.

Not exactly sure how to describe Potato Head. It is a beach facing bar and restaurant and accommodation area. The prime activity seems to be reclining on day beds and drinking. Not a bad way of spending a day but the day beds are very close together. The clientele are almost exclusively scantily clad pretty young things both male and female with some decidedly older people trying to be hip and with it. As far as dress standards go, James Bond says it better than me. "that's a nice little nothing you are almost not wearing". Not being a pretty young thing I decided to leave before I was taken for a pervert, or forced to pay for an outrageously expensive drink. The odd thing was I could not find an exit, except back to the beach. Of course there had to be one, but not being a guest I had no idea where to look.
Continuing on I came to Ku De ta. Golly gee willikas I had walked all the way to Kuta. This was not the Kuta that I remembered from my first visit in the mid 80's. Which at the time was grass huts facing the beach. In fact I did not recognise this area at all. Ku De Ta was quiet and I had no desire to linger, so I managed to find an exit, was asked if I needed a taxi as I left, which I politely declined and ended up on a road paralleling the beach. I took a punt, made a left turn and walked up the road for a few minutes and saw a sign pointing to Seminyak Square. Before I knew it I was back at the location of Vivai. I now understood where I was.
So I took a lunch break at one of the restaurants in the complex. A few drinks and a nice Steak and chips went down well. I knew where I was now and decided to continue my walk back to the hotel.
After a short while I began to realise that Bali Belly was not gone, in fact it was starting to come an urgent thing to deal with. By this time I was in the middle of nowhere. No toilets in sight. No Taxis in sight. Nowhere to "relieve" myself. I pushed on doing that stilted stiff legged walk, designed to minimise movement in the lower abdomen, that those in extremis seem to adopt.
My brain was calculating how long I could hang on and how far I had to go. The results were not encouraging. Eventually with what I thought was only a few hundred meters to go I saw a cab and flagged it down. The remaining trip was further than I had thought, continued walking would have been a disaster. I hobbled to my bathroom.
Relief.
Pure blessed relief.
No mess.
No disgrace.
Relief.
Stomach eased.
This was my last day, with a late night flight ahead of me, so I rested the rest of the afternoon and packed my bags.
Brutal is the plain honest truth
Late afternoon I wandered out and had another massage. The same place as the morning, it was worth going back. Pretty close to the massage place was Naughty Nuri's. This place is legendary. The original restaurant is in Ubud in the hills north of Denpassar, this their second restaurant is an experiment. Their claim to fame is fantastic slow cooked ribs which are finished on an open grill before serving. Their real claim to fame is wicked Martinis so strong that they would fuel a Space Probe. I have an experience of the original Naughty Nuri's and no memories of much of the rest of the evening.
I had ribs which were pretty dry and "ordinary" and a couple of Martinis, but was careful not to have excess. I left , caught a cab back to my hotel, picked up my bags and headed to the airport.
The Bludger got home about 4am, had a couple of hours kip and headed for work.

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